I won’t return your July 4th greeting. I won’t be wearing red, white, and blue or hosting an independence day celebration. I won’t hang my American flag, unless it is upside down (According to the U.S. Flag Code, flying the American flag inverted is legal, as a signal of dire distress in instances of extreme danger to life or property.). I won’t attend parades, or parties, or fireworks displays that signify the birthday of the nation, the celebration of the signing of our declaration of independence. I see no reason to celebrate a birthday when our democracy is in hospice care. I will not dance on its grave.

And please don’t try to sway me with guilt or cajoling. Would you tell a widow at her husband’s funeral to “get over it, move on, look on the bright side”? And this is not just about abortion rights–would that it were because one issue like that, given time and effort, could be resolved. But the loss of this fundamental right of women is just the tip of a giant iceberg of fundamental civil rights. And even worse is the reason why we lost that right and will surely lose more–any right previously declared by the US Supreme Court that has its genesis in the 14th Amendment is now fair game for repeal: gay marriage, biracial marriage, school integration, children born on American soil gaining citizenship regardless of their parent’s status, the right to an attorney for the accused, no discrimination based on sex (remember that we lacked the collective will to ratify or pass legislation to support these judgements).

So why have we set ourselves on this path? While there are many nuances the basic reason was so that the GOP could gain voters. The GOP–the party of Jefferson, Lincoln and Eisenhower, the party that ended slavery, expanded social security, increased the minimum wage in the 50’s, created the department of Health, Education and Welfare, and created the EPA–has sold its soul to the Religious Right, the white supremacists, the neo-Nazis, the uneducated and fiscally disenfranchised, the racists, the misogynists, the conspiracy theorists, and the greedy narcissists. The ONLY reason that we have a SCOTUS that is full of originalists who are hell-bent on steering this country back to 240+ years ago and has gutted Roe v. Wade is because the Republican party set out to win the conservative “Christian” vote by promising the end of abortion rights. Think about that. Their only real platform for decades, their only real campaign promise–besides cutting taxes which has helped no one but the top 10%–has been to roll back abortion rights. The leaders of the GOP don’t give a crap about abortion. They’ll be able to afford safe, secret ones for their loved ones. But the consequences of this drive are far more reaching than denying women the right to control over their bodies. Because the GOP isn’t the only “strongman” vying for power. Within the Republican party–as inside the Ghost of Christmas Future from “Scrooged”–are “demons” that are hiding safely within its folds, protected by its status and power. It isn’t that we haven’t always had white supremacists or conspiracy theorists among us; its just that the GOP has given them the bully pulpit, it has given them legitimacy to meet its own ends.

But please understand that I know this GOP is not “my grandmother’s Republican party. I don’t hate real Republicans. I married one (although as his party started sliding too far right he abandoned them). I believe in the need for a two-party system. Which is why this is so alarming. When one party will do whatever it takes–including selling out its own country for power–it should grieve every patriot, independence-loving heart. It grieves mine. Which is why you won’t hear my “Happy 4th of July!” and I feel like wearing black.